7 Times James Bond Was an HR Nightmare

Even spies have to follow rules, and James Bond has made a career out of breaking them.

But because he's cool and wears fancy suits while doing it, we give him a pass. Sure, he saves the world in the process, but leaves a ton of red tape in his wake. If Bond lived in the real world like the rest of us, the only trips he would take would be to and from the HR office.

In "Spectre," he goes (surprise, surprise) rogue to search for an evil organization and, in the process, he turns Mexico City into his personal UFC octagon -- complete with exploding buildings and fights in (and outside) flying helicopters. And that's all before the opening titles.

After 24 movies, Bond's Human Resources file must be pretty thick. Here are seven times 007 was a huge HR nightmare.

1. Drinking on the Job
Can't totally blame 007 for this one. If our boss had a cool office door padded with what look like leather couch covers, we'd want to have ALL the meetings there, too. M also served liquor to Bond on not one, but two, separate occasions during the Brosnan Era. So this one is kinda on her.

2. Breaking Into His Boss's House
Twice. Once in "Casino Royale" and in "Skyfall." In the former, he also hacked her computer and celebrated by playing solitaire in M's favorite chair. Apparently, Bond also carries a License to Make D**k Moves.

3. Letting Fellow Co-Workers Die Horribly
In "The Living Daylights," Bond's stiff-assed buddy, Saunders, decides to help Bond and his latest sex receptacle while on a layover in Vienna. What does Saunders get for his kindness? Exploded. While walking through a sliding-glass door. And what did Bond do? Nothing.

Traditionally, good employees shouldn't let their colleagues get killed or detonated right in front of them.

4. Bad at Following Directives
Most employees, when tasked with an assignment, they complete it and repeat. Maybe sometimes question the boss' orders, but the job gets done.

Not for Bond. In "The Living Daylights," after witnessing several 00's get killed, 007 holds off on reporting in so he can make eyes at some yacht sank (pictured) for an hour.

He then disobeys M's orders to kill a KGB assassin because his gut tells him otherwise. He then fakes the assassination of another high-ranking Russian figure, sparking an international incident, in between blowing up his own car and doing nothing to prevent the death of the aforementioned Saunders. This all goes down in one film.

5. Ridiculous Travel Expenses
The only trips Bond should be taking are dropping off forms to Accounts Payable.

Between first-class flight arrangements and usually traveling with some motor vehicle as a carry-on, Bond's expense reports could bankrupt MI6. Maybe even London. (Don't even get us started on all the health and safety forms you know he never fills out but leaves for some pencil pusher making less than $40k.)

6. Rampant Sexual Harassment
Legal must love Bond. In addition to decades worth of paternity suits, they have to contend with 54 years of bad sexual innuendos (pictured) and advances aimed at Moneypenny. Not to mention all the mental health stress and OT he forces upon Q every time he goes out into the field. James clearly needs Jesus.

7. Willful Property Destruction and Disrespect of Office Supplies
When lending 007 gadgets, MI6 should just have a "No Means No" policy. All Q ever asked for was for Bond to try to bring back the gadgets in one piece. And every time he asks, he's practically daring Bond to find new ways not to do that.

He seems to collect inventive ways to destroy his expensive cars; he's blown up Aston Martins, driving them through (and into) ice hotels, and left them at the bottom of Roman rivers. And you some of Bond's explosive pens and lazer watches -- he totally sells them on eBay.

But the fact that Q Branch still lends out their tech, or M still sends Bond on missions that result in several city blocks worth of wanton destruction, honestly they are their own worst enemy here. Good luck with that peer mediation, guys.


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