We're guessing (hoping?) that you're smart enough to know that the premise for Luc Besson's latest gonzo action movie "Lucy" -- about humans only using 10 percent of their brains -- is pure Hollywood nonsense. But why should pesky things like scientific fact and common sense get in the way of a good time? So, just like 2011's "Limitless," "Lucy" poses a high-concept thought experiment: Imagine what we could do with full 100-percent usage of our brains?
Scarlett Johansson stars as the titular Lucy, an American student in Taipei who gets unwittingly enlisted as a drug mule for a Taiwanese gang smuggling CPH4, a new street drug that's supposed to increase brain function (yes, just like in "Limitless"). But then those same bad guys kick her in the stomach a bunch of times, breaking the parcel and turning Lucy into a super-smart super-human. And that's when things really get crazy.
And since any movie that features a character wiretapping cell phone calls with her bare hands is pretty much critic-proof, instead, here's a guide to help you figure out how much brain power is necessary to enjoy Besson's brilliantly stupid sci-fi action flick.
How do you feel about Scarlett Johansson?
Forget all the easily debunked scientific mumbo-jumbo, this is the movie's true litmus test. Because while Besson's always had a way with ass-kicking heroines, whether or not "Lucy" works for you rests squarely on Johansson's shoulders. We already know she can do action, we know she's an award-worthy actress, but it's a rare skill to be able to do both at once. And maybe the most hard-to-believe part of "Lucy" comes from Johansson's opening scene with Mr. Jang (Min-sik Choi of "Oldboy") and the realization she's genuinely acting, instead of just phoning one in for a paycheque. Replace her with anyone else and "Lucy" doesn't work nearly as well, or maybe even at all. In other words, it's hard to imagine another actress being able to pull off a sustained monologue about the sound of her bones growing, or telling her mother she can remember "the taste of your milk in my mouth." (And yes, that's a direct quote.)
Would you take anything Morgan Freeman says at face value?
To be fair, the man's dulcet tones could convince us of pretty much anything, so Besson wisely enlists Freeman and his gravitas to play the movie's resident scientific expert, having him do most of the script's dirty work during a lecture explaining the various superpowers (like mind control) that could come from unlocking more of our brains. Meaning "Lucy" finally puts to the test whether we could watch Freeman speak nothing but complete gibberish and still buy it. Spoiler alert: Yup, we would.
Have you ever wanted to see "Tree of Life" reimagined as an action movie?
Just replace the Brad Pitt flashbacks with scenes of Scarlett Johansson shooting people, and otherwise it's all there, from the overwrought existential narration about the nature of man to the Big Bang and cheesy prehistoric CGI. Sure, this may be a total B-movie, but it's one with grand ambitions, which is why Lucy casually drops lines like "We never really die" mid-car chase, presumably to make you feel better about all the breezy collateral damage she's causing. Either way, there's a good chance that this movie was originally pitched as "'Tree of Life' meets 'Crank.'" Which, yes, is every bit as amazing as it sounds.
Do you care if the characters don't understand what's going on any more than you do?
As long as we're going with rough estimates here, it's probably safe to say that at least 75 percent of "Lucy" is just reaction shots of people staring at her with a bewildered look on their faces. In fact, "looking confused" seems to be the sole job description for Amr Waked in playing the French policeman who becomes Lucy's pseudo-sidekick. Ostensibly, the movie starts off as a revenge thriller, but the problem is, when you have a character that can do literally anything she puts her mind to, there's not really much to generate stakes or drama, as evidenced by a clever mid-movie "fight" scene that plays out like a mime act. The best everyone else can do is just shrug their shoulders and wait to see what crazy thing she does next.
How much do plot holes bother you?
For some reason, it's perfectly easy to accept that unlocking more than 20 percent of your brain can give you the power to turn back time and grow tentacles, but not that the movie's bad guys would give Lucy a plane ticket and tell her to be on her way, then lock her up for no apparent reason and kick her drug-filled stomach repeatedly. The mind is a funny thing.
Expect "Lucy" to test the limits of your tolerance for these kinds of logical leaps, but luckily, Besson also includes a few stylistic touches to help audiences along, from graphics showing Lucy's current brain power to cutting in nature scenes of cheetahs stalking their prey just so there's zero ambiguity about what's happening. "Lucy" is at it's best when it's content with just being patently ridiculous, and while it's not much more than 90 minutes of mindless fun, it's one of the few summer movies that doesn't insult your intelligent in order to deliver that fix. At least not completely.
"Lucy" opens in theatres on Friday, July 25.
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